Julia Bellerby
Counselling, Psychotherapy, Coaching and Counsellor supervision
Grad. Dip Counselling, Cert. Counsellor Supervision, Dip. Coaching
Mobile: 07939 255425  |  Email: Click here

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Call me on 07939 255425 or click here to contact me by email.

Counselling for Bereavement

There is no set way to grieve – we are all individuals and the sort of relationship you had with the person who died will influence the way you cope with losing them. There do, however, seem to be stages to bereavement and it can be helpful to know that any of the following is completely normal.
  • Denial – you simply can’t believe that it has happened. It doesn’t feel real.
  • Numbness – you don’t seem to feel anything at all. It’s as though your feelings are blocked.
  • Injustice – it feels so unfair. Why did it have to happen to you.
  • Pain and fear – intense feelings that can be overwhelming. It doesn’t seem possible that you can get through this.
  • Repetition – going over and over the events leading up to the death in your mind.
  • Guilt – if only you’d done or said things differently.
  • Hopelessness. Feeling depressed, even to the point of thinking about ending your own life. There seems little reason to go on without the person who’s died.
  • Sensing their presence – thinking you see or hear the person who’s died, often when you’re not expecting it.
  • Mood swings – from feeling angry to being tearful. Impatience – the bereavement process can take a long time.

It can be helpful to see the bereavement process as being a series of tasks: to accept the reality of the death, to work through the emotions associated with the loss, to learn how to cope with the practical differences of living without the support of the person who’s died, and to find new and different way of thinking about them. These tasks relate to the ideas of denial, anger and grief, learning to cope and 'moving on'.

Counselling can help with the bereavement process because it can be difficult to talk openly to friends and family members. You may be worried about upsetting other people who also knew the person who died. You may be concerned that you’re going on and on and that people are getting fed up with you. In counselling the focus is all on you. You can talk as much or as little as you like. Your counsellor will not mind if you become tearful or angry.
Julia Bellerby - Counselling, Psychotherapy, Coaching and Counsellor Supervision in York, and worldwide by phone, skype or online

Julia Bellerby
Grad. Dip. Counselling, Cert. Counsellor Supervision, Dip. Coaching, BACP Accredited
Contact me on 07939 255425 or click here to contact me by email.